feeling so vulnerable...

Today i woke up frm sleeping off feeling so fragile...i just felt that at any moment of time i can break down...patner infd me kinda of bad news 2 days ago..He infd me that he got to work for a drama shooting from 4th -11th which means that he will not ne available for the chalet and our 1st aniversary celebration...i dont't denied the fact that i do felt very dissappointed but theres nothing much i do...so instead of telling how dissapointed i am, i told him that im ok with it which on the other hand its so nooott...:(

But its ok lah..i will get over it very soon..today i really realised how $$$$ is sooo important in someone's life..without $ we can't do anything..well nvm i dun wish to dwell on it...while i was sleeping earlier , patner msged me and infd that he got something really bad to infd me but till now he still have yet to infd me what it is... i got the feeling he got to work on hari raya..well actually i kinda of expected that lar...i guess by following my family around for house visit is too much kinda of pressure for him to take..hmm i dun blame him...its the same as how i drag meeting his family coz im scared and many things lingered on mind such as will they accept me..wat do his bro, sis and mum think abt me a muslim , malay and not a very pretty girl..see!..all these enuf to give me jitters..its nt tat i dun want to..its just that i dun have enuf confidence...

I duno if its just the way i felt ot think, my relationship with mum is getting strain frm day to day...we both simply not that close anymore...its really making me sooo sad seeing the 2 of us simply got nuthing to talk abt when we are together...its really scare me...

well thats all for now...will update more when i got the time aite.

love,
your princess